I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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