It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
