you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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