She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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