i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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