Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
no you cant smoke seaweed
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
My penis needs a shock collar
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Randomize
