More tranny stories later!
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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