Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Randomize
