There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
