I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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