I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
there is glitter all over my balls
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
