Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Randomize
