I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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