if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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