Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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