But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Please, let me fuck your mom
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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