he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize