I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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