I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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