I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
