chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
