ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize