He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
