Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
