my mouth tastes like poor choices
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Randomize
