Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
