So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
