Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize