So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
