Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
He passed out mid-signature
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
