all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Found your dick twin last night
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
