but the lizard people decide everything anyway
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
