Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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