READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Randomize