i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
