Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
