I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
