I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
i think im in europe. pls send help
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