i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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