Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
