What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
