He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Be still, my beating vagina.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
