just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
my liver is dry heaving
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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