watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
