Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
