her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Found the puke drawer
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
