the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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