I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
