therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
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