ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
